Thankful

Thanksgiving just passed and it was a great day full of family, friends, amazing food, and Black Friday shopping! I have so much to be thankful for; my wonderful husband, my beautiful children, my loving family, the very best friends you could ask for, our home, our jobs, our health, and the unending love of a Heavenly Father and his on time provisions! I am also thanful for his gentle course correction.

I spend alot of my silent mental energy thinking about the adoption, the fundraising, how can we save more? I don't deal well with unknowns. I like a plan, a timeline, I like "knowns." But this whole process is teaching me how to live in unknowns and not lose my mind. I don't always win. In fact, I would say I wake up almost every morning and have to relearn the same lesson as the day before. It's funny how I can counsel women about resting and trusting in the timing of the Lord and his faithfulness and yet I struggle daily with this concept.

My pastor says this often, "What you recognize in your life you become thankful for. And what you become thankful for will increase in your life." You will never increase in areas of your life you are not thankful for. Period.

In other news...My 3 kids ages 9,7,6 were all off school the whole week of Thanksgiving. I love having them home really I do, but they are used to 8 hours a day of planned activities. I am not. And they wanted me to put up the Christmas decorations. Which takes me a full week to do when they are AT school. So we had a challenged week to say the least. I got aggravated from the top of the ladder several times during the week and demanded everyone needed some "quiet time in their room." I think I really just wanted someone to send me for some quiet time, though!

As I decorated the top of plant shelves, and milled over golf outing marketing strategies, I felt the Lord speak something to me. He said, "You are spending too much of your time and energy on something you have no control over. I am taking care of it, and you need to take care of your children." Whoa! I felt truly convicted as I realized I am not giving my 3 kids the best of me. I had spent more time aggravated than thankful.

Some of you may be tempted to judge me right now, and that's ok. I am openly confessing I need to do better job balancing my life. But I'm hoping more of you are relating with these feelings in one way or another and feel moved to be more thankful.

I want to work on recognizing the beauty and creativity and energy in my children and being thanful for all those things. If I expect the Lord to provide for this adoption, and I do because He promised it, then I must be thankful for what I have right now. I must be thankful for all the "knowns."

Here are my "knowns"

Abbey's "knowns" She is beautiful with brown eyes and bouncy dark blonde curls. She is endlessly creative and can make a scrap of paper an invention. She is a talented artist and is currently into sketching fashion. She is a great actess and singer. She is affectionate and loving. She is determined. She has a heart for Jesus and loves to help others.

Cole Roberts "knowns" This little boy wakes up every morning and the first words out of his mouth are a sleepy, "I love you, Mommy." He loves to cuddle. He is gentle. He loves Bible trivia. He can win every single wii game. He is smart, like real smart. He has a hilarious sense of humor. He can talk all.day.long.

A.J.'s "knowns" He has a calm about him. He has awesome hair. He builds amazing train tracks. He is good at Go Fish. His dimples will melt you every time. He loves one on one time. He is so funny. He is good at baseball and soccer. He loves to sneak up on the top bunk with his brother.

I am truly thankful for my children. And I want them to have the very best of me. God is taking care of my unknowns, it is my job to take care of the "knowns."

I know at the end of this we will say it wasn't by my might, or by my power, but by his spirit that all of this has happened.